As a soon to be 27 yr old, I think I can safely say, that being in my 20s was not what my teenage self thought it would be. I remember the days where I thought I would be married by 24, have two kids by 25 and own my own big house by 30 – which seems so ridiculous to even fathom for myself today (especially with these Sydney house prices)!
In reality, I found that my 20s, yes, contained a lot of exciting years, but also some of the most mentally draining years of my life (noted I’ve still got many years to live). If I could explain my 20s, I would say it’s like being released into the big scary world for the first time, and then have to figure out who you are. Which is something you’re not taught in school, and a very hard thing to do.
With that said, as a veteren 20 something year old myself, here are a couple things I’ve learnt:
No one really knows what they’re doing
Ever heard of ‘quarter-life crisis’? It’s definitely a real thing! We set this expectation for ourselves that after school, we will venture off to our life’s calling and become successful and rich, which is rarely the case. You may find that something you thought you were passionate about, changes mid-career because it wasn’t what you thought it would be (take me for example, I switched from a fashion career.. to finance marketing). And this happens a lot! Some people spend years travelling, some go straight into the work force to climb the corporate ladder and some try to build their own thing. Everyone’s just trying to figure it all out.
So lesson number 1: Don’t stress if you feel like you don’t know what to do with your life. No one really knows either. Use this time to try out new things, experience the world and find out what you really love. Your 20s is the BEST time to do that.
We fall into the bad habit of comparing ourselves to others
On social media we always preach that we shouldn’t compare ourselves to others, but sometimes it can’t be helped as it’s in our human nature.
Your 20s will be a very diverse time in your life.
You’ll find that some of your friends are married with 3 kids, some are still out partying to the sun rises, and some are just focused on their hustle and making money. It’s a pretty mixed bag, and kind of confusing. There’s times where you’ll question your life, and think to yourself ‘should I be doing that?’.
Which brings me to lesson number 2: Don’t compare your life stage to others, it’s a waste of time. Trust me, you don’t want a ‘competitive race to death’ (morbid, but true). Instead, focus on your own life and hitting your goals in your own time. You’ll find that you’ll be more productive when all your focus is just on you.
You might lose some friends… but also you’ll also make new ones
The transition from being a teenager to your late 20s is a huge one, and you might change. Your true friends will always stick by you, but you might lose some people in your life that just don’t fit there anymore. I for one can say that I’ve lost a couple of old friends, because our lifestyles just changed when we got older. I still cherish every moment I had with them as without those moments, I wouldn’t be who I am today.
On the lighter end of the stick, I’ve also made so many new friends who I’ve met through my journey and it has been amazing! We tend to have deeper connections as we’re just more aligned in life.
Lesson number 3: Cherish all the moments you’ve had with your friends, and if it wasn’t meant to be, then it wasn’t meant to be. People and their lifestyles changes (including yours). Just remember, you’re going to meet even more amazing people in the years to come.
You start realising things
As Kylie Jenner famously once said “this year… we’re all just realising things’. Now you can call me crazy, but I genuinely felt like I did ‘realise’ more things in my 20s. Perhaps we can reword this to ‘got wiser’? Everything just started to make more sense, like family dramas, why people have certain personalities, how things operate and the currrent state of the world.
This ones a little harder to explain but my mind felt like it saw reality for the first time. It feels a little more dull and stressful, but it’s in your hands to fix that mindset.
(I’ll end this one here, before someone thinks I’ve gone bat-sh*t crazy, so here’s lesson number 4): You’re going to have an awakening moment in life where you feel more wiser, see the world clearer for the first time, and get a little more stressed. If you can, use that knowledge to better your life and the world around you.
You’re going to start feeling old
Okay, controversial for any older readers here… but hear me out. Time goes so quick in your 20s, and escalates even more afterwards. I think it’s because you realise you’re not a teenager anymore and come to the realisation that time is moving forward. Not to mention, your body also starts to change as well. Now I’m not talking walking sticks and grey hairs, but you’ll have less energy, gain weight more easily (if you’re not exercising), and feel some aches here and there. That’s why it’s important to upkeep a healthy lifestyle.
So my final lesson here is this: Stay healthy, eat good and exercise! I might be exaggerating a bit in the previous paragraph, but maintaining a healthy lifestyle will help your mind, body and soul in your 20s. Most people start their full times jobs in their 20s, so you do lose a chunk of your time, but remember to set some time aside to focus on your health!
I would love to hear what you’re thoughts are, and what you experienced in your 20s – let me know in the comments below!
Disclaimers: General advice only.